


Deicide

by The_Readers_Muse



Category: Daybreakers (2009), Jurassic Park (Movies), Jurassic Park III (2001), Jurassic Park Series - Michael Crichton
Genre: Basically the events of all the JP's happened - then the vampire plague, Blood Drinking, Blood and Gore, M/M, Mild Language, Mild Sexual Content, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Temporary 'dark-alan', Vampires, Vampirism, alternative universe, possible dub-con elements
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-02
Updated: 2017-09-15
Packaged: 2018-12-22 17:35:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11972277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Readers_Muse/pseuds/The_Readers_Muse
Summary: He woke up to cold fingers combing through his shaggy curls.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own "Jurassic Park" or any of its characters, wishful thinking aside.
> 
> Authors Note #1: This is set in a fusion sort of universe where both the "Jurassic Park" and "Daybreakers" canon is melded together. This is set in a timeline after the events of Jurassic Park 3 where a Vampiric virus has spread around the globe (created, released, and now controlled by InGen). Billy and the others are part of the Resistance, the remnants of the human race still living free across the globe.
> 
> Warnings: vampires, blood, temporary 'dark-Alan', mild sexuality, possible dub-con elements, blood drinking, vampirism, drugging, au.

He woke up to cold fingers combing through his shaggy curls. Easing back the sweaty strands as fading callouses - familiar and intimate all in their own right - skated almost pleasantly through the crusts of half-dried blood that framed his aching temples.

He startled, flinching away before he realized where he was. Catching the flash of fangs and red-strung eyes looming above him before the ropes wrapped around his wrists jerked him back into the leather chair he was tied to.

_Alan._

The cold, streamlined metal of an expensive looking office gleamed in the low light as the man stared back at him openly. Drinking him in. He couldn't blame him. He was doing the same damn thing. It was the first time they'd seen each other in over five years. Something that brought back memories of Alan screaming for him to run,  _to just go_ \- body curving electric from the other side of the glass as Ian and Nick wrestled him away. Screaming without sound as one of the InGen soldiers dug a tazer into the underside of Alan's belly. Slumping him into the concrete as a woman he didn't recognize peeled away from the shadows and bared fang in the sickly florescent light. Hissing, seemingly at him directly, as she lifted Alan by the collar and sunk her teeth deep into his neck.

It'd been five years and now everything about him - from the cut of his expensive suit to the vacant-dark smile - felt so wrong he wanted to retch.

"Hello, Billy," the monster wearing Alan's face greeted. Hands posed calm and confident in his lap where he knew they should have been restless. Wearing the suit like it was an extension of his skin rather than something the man would have complained about and stripped off in pieces the moment he was out of the lecture hall or funding gala. It would have been a suit that was at least six years out of date and mis-matched with a pair of pants in desperate need of a hem. Nothing like this. Because this suit was new, expensive, tailored and sleek. It was midnight black with silver tie highlights and platinum cuff-links that probably cost more than three months worth of funding for a dig.

In a word?

It was  _nothing_  like Alan.

Other than the features that'd been frozen in time, familiar lines and angles he could still remember against his skin, there was nothing recognizable about him at all. It was like the virus had hollowed him out and InGen had stuffed him full with someone else.  _Some thing else._  Lex called it 'Pod-People Syndrome' and frankly he didn't think she was wrong.

He still remembered the sound Ellie had made when they'd finally managed to snap a clear shot of him leaving the InGen offices in Washington two months before. Intimately aware of the way she'd almost crumpled in on herself. One hand loose over her mouth as Sarah and Mark rushed to comfort her.

It wasn't him.

It was, but it wasn't.

He wasn't sure what was worse, honestly.

He swallowed hard, the ropes around his wrists vibrating tight, digging into his skin like a spreading rash as Alan unfolded himself from his seat and circled the room. Not once taking his eyes off him. He used the moment to reign himself in, watching Alan watch him as five years worth of work came down to this one, singularly important moment.

Ellie and Ian had been right. The moment he'd tossed up a metaphorical white flag Alan had seized on it -  _on him_  - like a beacon. It was enough to help him justify the risk with those higher up in the Resistance. If  _that_ part of Alan was still there, the one that still cared about him in a twisted sort of way, maybe it would be enough. Maybe he'd be able to get through to him. Maybe it would be enough to trick him into-

He forced his breathing to calm as he cataloged his surroundings. If he was here now that meant everything was going according to plan. Both the Resistance's plan and his. Because the truth was, he was a hypocrite. He fought for humanity, for their survival, but all along all he ever wanted was this.  _A chance._  Ever since they'd taken him the only thing that'd driven him was an almost pathological need to find a cure and bring Alan back.

"It's been a long time," the man continued, circling back to stand in front of him. Smoothing the cut of his suit with a fastidiousness that wasn't his own. "I'll admit, longer than I'd like. I only wish I'd found you sooner. You're malnourished, I can smell it. How long has it been since you've eaten anything, Billy?"

He said nothing, letting the silence do the talking. Playing the part Alan expected of him after years on the run. Helping form the resistance with humans and vampires alike as the man sighed and pressed a button on his desk.

"You could have come to me you know," Alan told him. Settling himself in the chair opposite as a pale red-head in a long silver dress breezed smoothly through the door. Carrying a covered tray that she set on the table in front of him before leaving again. "Before all of this. Everything you've gone through? Everything you've suffered? It was unnecessary. I could have prevented it. You should have trusted me."

"Trust? How?" he spat. Unsure of which part of him was talking this time as he fisted the ropes fiercely - muscles jumping under his skin. "You're one of them. You've changed Alan, they changed you! The virus and InGen. They're controlling you! Other vampires are starting to rise up! They're standing with us. Why not you? What're they doing to you? Do you even know? Think about it. How long has it been since you went on a dig? Since you even looked at a bone? They have you stuffed in fucking  _office_ \- wearing a monkey suit. They made you into this. Alan this isn't you. Siding with InGen? I _know_  it isn't you. It can't be."

The monster's smile was chillingly condescending.

"It's true. I  _have_ changed. We all have. Even you, Billy," Alan told him, gliding smoothly to his feet again like some part of him wouldn't be kept still. Reminding him of the restlessness that eventually got to him when he was stuck at home drafting grant proposals in the off season. "But the truth is, InGen simply made me face some hard truths. The world has changed again, just like after the park. Humanity isn't on top anymore. The virus was another way of teaching us that lesson at the sake of our own pride. But it also gave us a gift along with the growing pains. A way to evolve like the world has never seen. We should be grateful for that."

He gritted his teeth. Reminding himself he had only one shot at this. He either saved Alan here and now, or he lost him forever. The margin was as cut-throat as any mission he'd been on, but just like always Alan had managed to catch him of guard. Luckily for him, being angry at Alan, InGen and the universe wasn't a hard part to play in the scheme of things.

It wasn't all personal. The Resistance wouldn't have approved the mission otherwise. If they could get to Alan then they could gain access to InGen's systems. The blood shortage had made them weak and on the cusp the same way humanity was. The major shareholders were distracted, disorganized and on the verge of isolating themselves and their human blood-stock from the global market as the risk of widespread starvation became a very real possibility. It was now or never, essentially.

But the reasons why saving Alan was a risk the Resistance was willing to take didn't stop there. There was one key difference they were still trying to understand. Unlike the majority of vampires, Alan hadn't chosen the bite. He'd been turned by force - against his will. Just like the handful of vampire senators that were working in secret for the Resistance. The virus burned you out, but sometimes it didn't take everything. Sometimes it left just enough ground to rebuild again.

"Of course InGen is aware that your so-called 'Resistance' is working on a cure," Alan remarked casually, watching him so closely he seemed to get momentarily distracted when he visibly swallowed. Watching Alan follow the tense line of his neck from jaw to collar, before shaking himself slightly and moving away again. "Wasted time, but predictable. I assume you're right in the thick of it and this is some sort of play for resources? After all this facility  _is_ the central hub for the entire eastern seaboard. What did you think would happen, Billy? Did you really think I would let you have the run of the place? I love you, but I'm not  _that_ blind."

Something deep in his chest curdled. Sour and acidic in the back of his throat like violent chemistry as his fists tightened around the bite of the rope. Drawing the man's eerie golden-red eyes back to him. Spine stiff against the plush leather chair as his tongue strangled the words he knew better than to say.

Alan had never said it.  _Not once._

He'd known.  _Of course he'd known._

But he'd never said it.  _And now-_

Alan had never been good at that sort of thing and he'd gone into things knowing that. It'd been there, obvious and good as anything. They'd just never gotten around to saying the words. He'd always been waiting for the right time, not wanting to push him into anything he wasn't ready for. Well aware that Alan's particular brand of baggage was generally tractor-trailer heavy on top of part of the problem being him by himself. Alan had never been particularly socially aware, or even self-aware. Especially when it came to relationships. And now this  _thing_ \- this thing that was wearing Alan's face was letting the words go like they were easy. Turning them into something flippant, cheap and ill-timed, rather than the thing he'd had nightmares about for the past five years.

_Vampires and dinosaurs weren't the only things that ate you alive these days._

_Regrets were right up there with them._

_Hell, regrets were worse._

"InGen thinks you're a decoy. I think it doesn't matter. I have you now. Everything is going to be alright, it's going to go back to the way it was between us. I promise you'll understand, you'll understand everything," Alan told him, fangs glinting sharp and feral as the man's lips lifted in a dangerous smile he didn't recognize. Unable to suppress the flinch this time when the vampire sank down on his haunches in front of him and reached forward.

"Five years and still so lovely," Alan murmured, thumbing down the hunger-thin curve of his cheek before investigating the rasp of stubble against his fingers. Eyes crinkling, just like they used to, before the expression smoothed again. "But then, you've always been, haven't you Billy? Do you know how long it took me to find you? What I had to do to get you here safely?"

The sound of an intercom echoed tinny from the other room. Catching Alan's attention in a way he didn't like as the vampire's superior hearing gave him an edge he didn't have. It was as good a warning as any to speed things up. They were running out of time. It was only a matter of hours before InGen would-

"I missed you," he whispered, feeling it from his gut as the words came out almost plaintive. Not one syllable of it a lie as Alan inched fractionally closer. So close he swore he could feel the chill radiating through the layers of their clothes. Wondering how much of it was an instinctive draw to the hush of blood and a living heartbeat than it was Alan. "Every day."

_Because he had._

They'd been on the run together when InGen had caught up with them. Picking up the others along the way until they were stuffed in the basement of a friend of a friend of Ellie's husband. Clustering around a map of the continental United States, trying to figure out their next move. They hadn't known it then, but it'd been all about Alan from the start. He'd been who they wanted. Someone known in the scientific community they could put up as a role-model as state after state fell into vampirical control. Someone they could put on the campaign circuit to boost the numbers of volunteer turnings as the human population started upping their protests against the bills moving through congress.

The last thing Alan wanted was this.

To be turned against his will and used to methodically cull what was left of the human race.

Altered into a state of vacant, spreading cold and predatory malice.

Now it was up to him to make things right.

To bring him back.  
_  
To bring them all back._

He waited until their lips were so close they could have brushed - chaste and gentle like the first time - before he spoke again. Stilling the moment with expert timing.

"Do you remember my first dig?" he asked, turning his head slightly, enough that it made the sudden baring of his neck look innocent. "My sunscreen got stolen out of my carry-on and I burnt so bad you took pity on me and invited me up for dinner. Kraft dinner, pork and beans and luke-warm beer."

A muscle in Alan's cheek tightened.

"Of course I do," Alan murmured after a pause, pressing another button on the side of his desk as he settled back into his chair. Fingers steepled in front of him. "How could I forget? Nothing has changed, Billy. Nothing that matters anyway. Whatever they've been telling you about how we do things _, how we are_ , I can assure you that you've been mislead."

He held onto the retort that wanted to break free by the skin of his teeth. Distracting himself by watching warily as the same woman who'd brought in the tray came breezing back through the doors and placed a cup of blood-tinted coffee on Alan's desk. Nodding smartly with a swirling skirt and the almost indecent flash of bare legs that was utterly lost on him before exiting again.

Something things would apparently never change.

It was almost enough to pull a smile out of him.

_Almost._

When he looked up Alan was staring at him again. Unrepentant and obvious in his interest and yeah- concern. Shades of the old Alan shining through this time around as the man eased himself to his feet and placed the covered tray in front of him, lifting the lid to reveal a-  _god_.

He hadn't even so much as  _seen_  a piece of meat in  _months._

No less a steak and potato dinner with all the fixings.

_Christ._

He swallowed through the sudden rush of saliva. Stomach gurgling loud enough he knew Alan had to have heard it. Hating and loving him just a little bit more as the man smirked like the answer to an unasked question.

"There's nothing in it, I assure you," Alan told him, settling back down in his chair as he used the small spoon set in the saucer to stir the blood into his coffee. "I thought we could share a meal together, like we used to. Please, eat."

The debate was over remarkably swiftly. He was too hungry to keep staring all the damn thing. And the fact that it was his favorite cut and sear wasn't lost on him either. Privately wondering, as the ropes around his wrists fell slack, who was the bigger idiot in the room. Him or the thing wearing his lover's face as he dug into a meal that for all he knew, really was laced with a sedative, or worse.

His money was on nothing, so that was what he gambled on.

And for good reason.

Because despite everything, he still trusted him.

_He would always trust him._

Most people would call it stupid, wishful thinking, but he knew better. When InGen had turned Alan they'd gone about it wrong. And he wasn't just talking about the lack of consent. The truth was, vampirism - despite the instincts – wasn't a blanket guarantee of obedience to the ruling faction. They were predators, all of them, cold and aloof and ruled by a completely different set of instincts and biology. But there was one thing the virus couldn't completely change and that was the person.  _Who they were at the core_. If he could get the two sides – the vampire and the man - warring against each other he might be able to get through to him.

The one thing the virus couldn't do was destroy its host.

That was the only saving grace when it came to it's genetic make-up.

And that was  _exactly_  what he was counting on.


	2. Chapter 2

They ate in silence.

Or at least he did.

Alan watched him speculatively over the rim of his cup. Not realizing he was filling the air between them with a low, contented purr that threatened to shiver down his spine. Something that was felt as well as heard as he gripped his fork and knife tightly. It was the type of sound he'd only heard about up until now. Something he'd read as being a sign of open pleasure and relaxation. Rare and animal. Like a vampire's version of a weekend lie-in. Snuggled up in the covers with that one person that made them feel like-

_Oh._

He swallowed the last bite slowly, savoring it as much as possible before he reluctantly set his knife and fork aside. Wiping his mouth with an expensive looking cloth napkin before he looked up. Trying and failing to look unsurprised when Alan made no move to press the button that would tighten his restraints again.

He wouldn't.

Not unless he had to.

That part was purely Alan.

"So, you have me. Now what?" he posed calmly, leaning back in his seat as he tried his best to fit into a very difficult niche. Where he came across as composed, but not cocky. As someone who didn't any particular sort of plan, but wasn't about to give away his cards either. This was the part he wasn't sure about.  _Because Alan knew him._  Probably better than anyone. He didn't need words to know what he was thinking or what he was about to do. Just like that moment in the bird cage on the island. Alan had known before he'd even snapped the buckle on the para-sail that he was going to jump. "What'd you plan on doing with me? Something tells me the first class dinner service is only temporary. Don't get me wrong, I'm impressed. I don't think I've even seen a cow in over three years. It's just, call me crazy, but I don't buy the act."

The smile that stretched this time was so close to being genuine it hurt to watch.

Still, the expression – and his use of sarcasm - was ultimately ruined when Alan merely finished off his coffee. Flashing the hint of fang as his lips pulled away from bloody porcelain. Not bothering to suppress the contented sigh that followed before he set his cup aside.

"You know what I want," Alan replied simply, but with the air of someone who had no doubt they'd get their way - one way or another. "I don't want to force you, Billy. But you don't have many options at this point."

He shook his head.

"I have no intention of taking the bite," he remarked coldly. Hoping the boldness would serve a dual purpose. Making him appear gratingly over-confident while still appealing to the memory of better times. Mostly when that same over confidence got him into trouble.

At this point it was all about stalling for time, anyway.

"So, I'm left with the option of convincing you," Alan remarked thoughtfully, clearing his throat with a frown that was gone almost as soon as it had appeared. Getting to his feet again as he loosened his tie fractionally around the pale of his throat. "I have to admit that the position you've put me in _is_  difficult. With the blood shortage I'm getting immense pressure to hand you over to the refinery for processing after I've gotten the necessary information from you. Where the human camps are, the size of the Resistance, how close you are to a cure, that sort of thing. Once that happens it will be out of my hands. However, my influence here is sizable. I can turn you and face very little in the way of consequences. Like I said, I've been preparing for this for a long time. I've ensured that there is a sizable amount of blood in my private reserves, enough to sustain us while the substitute is completed. _Billy_ , ever since we were separated getting you back has been my only thought. To make sure you were safe and by my side again."

There was a moment near the end of his monologue where Alan blinked. Like he was surprised to realize that somewhere in the middle of speaking he'd gotten to his feet. Moving almost restlessly around the room. Circling like an overly large bird of prey before he forced himself to still in front of him.

"If we'd been able to make a cure, would you have taken it? For me?" he asked softly. Choosing his words carefully as Alan's attention sharpened.

 _Oh yes, think that. Think that we have nothing. Think that you're safe. Superior. Think that. Take the god damned bait, you bastard. Do it._   _Give me just enough to room to drown you in your own-_

"Billy," Alan started, before breaking off suddenly. Blinking with lids slung low as he inhaled audibly. Looking for a long moment like he was about to try and touch him before he pulled away with the sort of effort that was obvious if you were looking for it. Pressing the button on the side of his desk as he visibly rallied. Smoothing the drape of his sleeves like his fingers needed to be occupied. "It isn't that simple. You know that."

"There's nothing complicated about it," he negated. Forcing Alan's attention again as the vampire's nails elongated slowly at his sides.  _It was working._  "Don't you remember? InGen turned you against your will. You know I don't want this, Alan. Do you really want to do the same thing to me? What if there was a cure? If I had it right now, would you take it? We could be together. The Alan I knew would have. It wouldn't even be a question. Even if he was convinced I was wrong, he would trust me."

He broke off when the office door swished open and the same red-head from before clicked her way into the room with another cup of coffee. Her expression was closed off with a cool, professional veneer. But it was obvious to anyone with eyes that she'd been caught off guard. This wasn't his usual routine.

"What type of blood is this?" Alan asked as she set the fresh cup in front of him. Barely waiting that long before he reached for the handle. Bringing the cup to his nose as he inhaled lushly.

"Your usual sir. From your private collection," the woman replied, frowning now. "Is there a problem?"

"Is it from the fresh stock? The latest shipment?" Alan asked, seeming to realize he was letting a too much show as he slowly put the cup back down onto the saucer. Flashing her a commiserating smile she seemed to relax into immediately – openly relieved. "If that's the case, it appears I might have a new favorite donor."

"I'm not sure, sir. This particular bag came in last week with the usual shipment," the red head told him. Reaching down to collect the empty cup as her eyes slid curiously over to him and his loose bonds, before snapping back to Alan again.

"Please look into it for me, Melissa." Alan responded, as if by way of dismissal. Saying nothing else as he picked up his spoon and stirred the blood evenly into his coffee. Swirling it into a thick muddy brown that threatened to turn his stomach as the iron-taint of pure human blood reached him from across the desk.

"Of course, Doctor Grant."

He kept his face more or less blank as the woman exited. Letting nothing show save for frustration and worry as Alan went so far as to clean the spoon - treating him to the muted click of fang against metal - before he finally set it aside. Watching him take a cautious sip as the vampire's eyes flashed tawny-gold. Once again finding something familiar in the deep, contented sigh that followed as Alan set the cup back down reluctantly. Keeping one hand loose around the handle like it was something precious. Something that needed to be protected. Savored.

_It was working._

Jesus Christ.

It was working!

"As I was saying, it isn't that simple," Alan continued. "You know what it's like out there. The blood shortages are only going to get worse. The tag line of: "there will always be more" is wearing thin. There are some companies already threatening to pull their stock from InGen's main facilities. A total collapse of the blood market is almost a certainty at this point, even if the blood substitute is finished on time. If you turn, you'll be safe. I can keep you safe.  _Fed._  I promise. But as you are now, that's all but impossible and you know it. Half the building knows you're here from your scent alone. They're loyal to me. I give them incentives to stay that way and even then I've been informed by security that there has been at least one attempt to gain access to this floor since I brought you here. What do you think will happen even if you managed to get free? The entire city is on the verge of starvation. You wouldn't make it half a mile. It isn't safe to be human, especially now."

His lips were a hard line across his face. Pressed thin around the curves of his teeth. So tight that he could feel the line between enamel and plastic. The came clean break his mother nearly had a canary over when he'd broken his front tooth falling off his bike back in sixth grade.

"Would it help if I told you that some of my reasons come down to pure selfishness on my part?" Alan offered, smiling a bit wider than he had before as the admission made him look up from the arms of chair.

"I can admit now that I always worried about getting older on you," the man continued. "Especially after what happened on Isla Sorna. I know we weren't at our best for a long time after that. And the truth was, I felt it. I didn't bounce back as quickly as I did the first time. I was getting older, I suppose."

"I told you I didn't care about that," he gritted, more angry than he'd been in a long time as the monster wearing Alan's face made everything ten times worse. "We talked about this. You know I don't care. All I've ever wanted is you.  _You, Alan._  No one else."

"I know and I believed you. I still believe you. But you're young, and even if you'd stayed we would have faced a goodbye sooner or later. Not to mention my twilight years would still have you in your prime. It wasn't a fair thing for me to ask of you, but now all that has changed. No aging. No guilt. No goodbyes. We have all the time in the world now."

"What the hell are you talking about?! That's life, Alan.  _Life._  We get old and we die. That's the point. Everything dies. Everything has it's time. If it doesn't, then what's the point?"

"Be realistic, Billy," Alan murmured, lips flirting with the rim of his cup as he took another long sip. "What could I have given you? Ten, twelve, maybe fifteen good years before the problems started creeping in? And what about financially? You knew it wouldn't have been much. I'd been bailing out the last few digs with my own savings before the virus hit. Now things are different. Thanks to the virus. Thanks to InGen. Being turned was a gift, I understand that now."

It was like watching someone else speak.

Like someone else was moving Alan's lips and tongue.

And it took every fiber in him not to lash out.

Believing for a single, insane moment that if he could just touch him he could-

"Bullshit," he snapped instead. Keeping his tone on a razor-wire tether as Alan's eyes flashed red. "On Isla Sorna you told me I was just as bad as the people that'd built the park. So what does that make you? Come on Alan, I know you. This is everything you stood against. Whatever the virus wants you to do,  _fight it._  InGen wants to destroy the human race. You know about the underground warehouses? We're just livestock to them. Blood farms. Breeding stock. Even when the blood substitute is perfected, you know it will only be a matter of time. Enough to boost the numbers in captivity and we'll be right back here. You might be right, maybe by then I'll be like you and not feel it. But are you going to let this happen to the others? Forget about me, what about Ellie, Lex and Tim? What about Malcolm and his family? Eric and the Kirbys? Are you going to let InGen hunt them down and hook them up to a ventilator too? Huh? Are you going to let them strip them down to nothing more than the blood they can offer?"

The shift wasn't immediate, but once it was there - back-lit in the dark of Alan's eyes - it didn't fade. Instead, it grew.

"They're- they're alive?" Alan breathed, rising almost unsteadily. Expression a far cry from the composed mask that'd shielded it earlier. "Ellie and the kids? They're still alive?"

"What do you care?" he returned disdainfully, tone like a slap. "You can't save all of them. InGen won't let you and you know it. They might let you get away with turning me - but the others? Not a chance in hell. They're just food. Meals on wheels as far as InGen is concerned."

Alan's eyes narrowed. Hissing audibly despite his lips keeping to a firm slash across his face. Hands like claws around the curl of his desk like he was seconds from splintering it.

"So, now what? Are you going to let them die? You know Charlie still calls you the dinosaur man? He talks about you all the time. Hell, even Malcolm misses you. They're on borrowed time and when InGen finds them they're going to go right to one of those factories, am I right? What do they call it? Bagged, tagged and drained?"

"No, they're mine!" Alan hissed, territorial and almost feral as his chair shot out from under him. Rocking back on his heels and seeming to sink back into himself in the aftermath. Running a hand through his hair - just like he used to - as the cold facade continued to shatter, piece by piece, without the man even being aware of it.

He told himself he didn't feel guilty.

That considering the circumstances he didn't have to.

But it was a lie.

Mostly.


	3. Chapter 3

"What do you want, Alan?" he asked, softly this time. Watching him drain the rest of his coffee like it was something fortifying. Giving the empty cup a double take - like he hadn't expected to be finished so quickly - before looking over at him again.

"I want you to chose  _us_ , Billy," Alan told him. Earnest and almost achingly familiar as he moved forward. Sinking down on his haunches in front of him. "You and me. I want us to be together again."

The man paused, hands hovering just above the flat of his thighs. Looking up at him quickly, as if to make sure he was still allowed, before he edged closer. Bracing his hands firmly this time. It was a half-forgotten snarl of intimacy that was only made stranger by the chill that seemed to radiate through his clothes and into his skin. But for the first time, he welcomed it. Baring his throat boldly as the man choked on a breath he didn't need. Something wordless and desperately feral shared between them as Alan almost swayed into him. Soaking up his warmth as that strange purr rumbled from his chest like an alien heartbeat.

"So do I!" he insisted. Knowing this part was about as lost a cause as they came, but still needing to get it out. To remind Alan that free choice was still an option. That he didn't want to do this. Not like this. Not like-

"If you come back with me you can see all of them. They miss you, Alan. We can be together again, just like before. We can find a cure for all this.  _We can save everyone_. Human and vampire. It's not too late. I don't believe that- what InGen says? Things  _can_ go back to the way they were. Before the virus. We'll find a way. Please, just come with me! Tell them you're taking me home to turn me privately. They'll believe that. Then we'll just go. I'll drive through the daylight, we can do it. Please, Alan!"

The worst part was he wouldn't-  _couldn't_  trust him even if Alan agreed.

Not like this.

Not when the monster was the one calling the shots.

"I-" Alan started, breathy and quick. Breaking off like it was suddenly too much as he stared up at him. Unknowing ceding him the higher ground. Able to see the conflict building in the back of cold, predator eyes before the intercom chimed smartly

"Sir," his secretary greeted, hesitating a beat before continuing. Voice disembodied but crisp through the speaker built into Alan's desk. "I apologize for the interruption, but there seems to be a mix up regarding a specific donor. There's no account on record. I think the paperwork must have been delayed. It shouldn't be a problem to track the donor down once I have the proper number. At worst, we received a shipment from a donor that wasn't in your private collection, at best- this donor was merely mislabelled. I will inform you when I hear by from the supply headquarters."

He took it as a sign when Alan didn't straighten or move away. Rasping a distracted platitude and firm dismissal before the line clicked off as he openly scented down his neck. Making him shiver against his will. Unable to deny that while part of him was afraid, the rest of him was helplessly aroused.

He stopped breathing when Alan's cheek grazed down his stubble. Unable to curb the desire to turn his head into it. Surprising himself by daring to press a chaste little kiss into the corner of Alan's mouth while he was there. Soaking up the wealth of sounds the man was letting go of - vampiric and human alike - as control became a pipe dream Alan wasn't aware he was losing by the second.

He waited until he couldn't hold back anymore. Until there was barely any space between them before he spoke again. Almost hemmed in as Alan set his hands on the armrests of his chair. Leaning in, closer and closer, until he was barely-

"It's mine," he told him lowly.

"What?"

"The blood? It's mine," he admitted, voice flat despite the bombshell as something flickered in the back of Alan's eyes. Something that could have been surprise if it hadn't been forced to fight through the growing haze he had to be feeling by now. Drugged and almost  _desperately_  tempted as the moment etched out painfully slow.

"I lied," he continued bluntly as Alan stilled, pulling away only fractionally. "You see, we _did_  make a cure. But it isn't something we've been able to turn into an injection or a pill. Not yet, at least. Right now it has to be done in a working lab. We had to work with what we had. But Alan- it's the sun.  _The sun._  It can bring you back. I've seen it happen.  _And it's real."_

The cold metallic accents of the room bled with shadows.

Lengthening and warping like a supernatural clock.

He was running out of time.

"I was the bait. See, we knew,  _I knew_ , you'd do just about anything to get me back. Even like this," he added, slowly untangling himself from the loose loops of rope as Alan watched and did nothing. Looking like he was caught between action and inaction as he wavered unsteadily on his knees. Mouth opening and closing but only a thin, hungry little whine warbling out.

He leaned forward, looking Alan right in the eye as he shuffled off the chair and slumped down on his knees to face him. Tracing the open seam of Alan's lips with a lingering caress that felt electric and possible despite being almost five years late.

"You didn't find me, Alan. I found you. I  _let_  myself be caught. I knew you'd keep me safe until I could return the favor."

"You can't- this is not… it's not- what is this?" Alan started, trying so hard to be verbal it was almost cringe worthy. In danger of slumping over completely as the man hooked his nails into the frayed hems of his jeans. Scrabbling for a hand-hold as his pupils expanded so wide there was barely any iris left around the edges.

"No," he assured patiently, forgetting to hesitate this time as he inched forward and helped him up. Keeping him more or less upright as the sharp of the man's claws broke new ground in the meat of his shoulders. "We had to find a way to get you to the lab. I knew you wouldn't leave, if you could you would've already. InGen has it's hooks too deep. So, we cheated."

Alan's head bowed, nodding groggily as the feathers of his hair fluttered loose. Framing the side of his face just like those lazy mornings in bed in the summer. Smiling into the sheets as the man nursed a cup of coffee and one of those old green leather books from the top shelf in his office. Propped up in bed on a small mountain of pillows he'd originally grumbled about when they'd made the journey from his bed to Alan's.

"We found a way to drug you. It took years, but we finally found something that would work. It was accidental- one of the people that works with the resistance is a vampire. They fell in love with one of our people and found out accidentally when they were- well- anyway. We discovered that the blood of a vampire's lover has an almost narcotic effect. So we amplified it. I ended up hooked up to a drip and when we had enough to fill the bag we injected the blood with the accelerated compound," he explained as Alan nuzzled back into the crook of his neck. Intoxicated and reeling against his throat. Knowing he was too far gone to understand, but feeling like he owed the man that much.

Alan hushed his named into his skin. Wet with drugged humidity and the flirtatious tease of sharp canines as one hand tangled in his collar. Every muscle tensing under his skin as the moment flinched through every change. Edging closer and closer to-

"Someone will be here soon to pick us up, and then we will both go through it together," he told him, more for his nerves than anything as the hand in his collar suddenly jerked downward. Tearing his shirt right down the middle as buttons pinged off into the depths of the office. Swallowing convulsively as his bare skin prickled with goose-flesh. "You'll get what you want, Alan. You probably will turn me, it just won't be permanent."

He forced the man's chin to tip, desperate to see something recognizable in Alan's face as his tongue languished heavy in his mouth. Tripping over all the words he wanted to say. Ones he'd waited five years for the opportunity. Only to fall short in the moment.

It wasn't like he'd imagined.

It was worse.

It was the best kind of betrayal.

But still betrayal.

And he had to live with that.

_Somehow._

"Please forgive me?"

But Alan wasn't there, honey-red pupils blown wide as he staggered into him. Pushing him back against the chair until there was no where left to shrink to. Inhaling throatily as the dry-plush of the man's lips rubbed back and forth against the crux of his jaw.

"Billy, I can't- I need-"

"Shhh, he hummed, reaching for him. Pulling him close as the sudden stab of cold jerked through him like a knife thrust. Closing his eyes into it as Alan's lips found his pulse point. "Take what you need, I'll still be here when it's over."

The moment Alan's fangs broke skin was the first time he  _really_  understood.

It was like coming home.

Like discovering a hidden link.

A plateau of post-human awareness.

It was a permanent high.

An animal understanding.

It was a corded, building pleasure that rolled out faster than any peak.

It was like getting tossed into the sheets as the Alan he remembered loomed above him.

It was getting kissed, quick and just shy of vicious, down the length of his collarbone.

It was the quickest rise to everything he'd never realized he'd wanted, coupled together with the worst kind of craving. Jerking spasmodically though it as he came with a quiet sound into the fading warm of his human skin. Coddled through it as Alan drank deeply. Whispering promises and a reassurance that was finally- only-  _Alan._

Like-

* * *

"Alan…Alan."

It wasn't until it was all over, when he'd woken up beside Alan in the bottom well of the wine fermentation tank they'd used for the first experiment - wet and reeking of singed hair, ozone and spring - that he crawled over to him. Cradling his head in his lap as he watched Alan's eyes flutter open, golden-red iris' fading to familiar blue as he coughed weakly.

"Billy- Billy- I-"

He caught Alan's hand before it could make it to his face. Bringing it up himself as the muscles in the man's arms quavered heavy for the first time in five years. Burrowing his face into Alan's filthy palm as salt-track tears trickled between the man's fingers. Crying openly as Alan refused to look anywhere but him.

"Billy..."

His thumb brushed back and forth across the man's cheek as the reassuring beat of the heart monitor celebrated their humanity in the distant background.

"I'm so sorry, Billy. I should've- I should have said it," Alan murmured. "I love you...I have for a long time. Before this and during. I was a fool not to-"

Somewhere outside, the sound of the others leaked through. Celebrating wildly and vibrating eagerness across the outside of the tank despite the moment they were allowing them to have for themselves. Time to settle things. To come to terms with the difference five years and the virus had made. To say all the things they'd left unsaid. But most of all, to just be.

"Thank you," Alan murmured, looking like something out of an ancient nightmare with blood still smeared thick down his chin. "Thank you for bringing me back."

"You know I'd never leave you behind," he smiled softly, the bite mark on his neck throbbing hotly through the bandage someone must of wrapped around it not long after they'd been tranquilized and brought to the safe house. "I'm just sorry it took me so long."

"I never doubted you would," Alan responded sleepily, head lolling loosely as blunt nails tried to find traction against the bottom of the tank. Cautiously trying to lever himself upright, only to fall back against his chest with a satisfying thump when he realized he was too weak. "I'm just glad you knew me better than I knew myself."

"So what else is new?" he teased, smiling hugely into the soft strands of his hair. Inhaling happily before finally responding to what Alan had said before. Practically walking on air as he remembered how Alan had said the words like they were  _everything._

"It's alright," he told him, meaning it for the first time in a long time. "I always knew you did."

Alan's hand was warm in his as the silence swallowed the rest with comforting rhythms and natural heartbeats. Sitting together on the floor as humanity rapidly became not a metaphor or simply a state of being, but a gift he'd never really appreciated until he had to choose between being slowly bled to death or giving up on the concept completely.

The corner of Alan's lips quirked up like he knew exactly what he was thinking. Going so far as to squeeze his hand and nod as someone started to climb the ladder to open the access hatch. Whoever it was – probably Tim or Billy - clambering excitedly up the ladder as the off-centre tempo of rubber soles and something metallic echoed like another revived heartbeat.

They were going to win this war.

Together.

There wasn't a doubt in his mind anymore.

Not when he had Alan.

**Author's Note:**

> Reference:
> 
> \- deicide: the destruction or killing of a god.


End file.
